she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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