Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
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