Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
