I'm jealous of your bromance
chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
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