i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
