Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
You ate ashes out of my bong
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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