At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Randomize
