he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Randomize
