Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
