Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
