she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Randomize
