Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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