i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Randomize
