Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
my penis made a compromise with my morals
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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