please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
she peed on how many people?
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Randomize
