I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize
