Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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