hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
I want you more than these girls want KFC
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Randomize
