I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize
