He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
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