I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Randomize
