You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Randomize
