Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
