32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Randomize
