i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
