I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
