my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
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