She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Randomize