I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
Randomize
