is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
