just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
Randomize