The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
