I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
