The brown eye won't let me do that either.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Everything about him screamed your future.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize