I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Farmville is her only friend.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
And then he peed in my hair
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