I wanna passion pit in your ass
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
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