Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize