great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
