hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize