we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
