? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize
