stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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