I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
