pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
