How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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