Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
They took my balls.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
