I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
