And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
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