it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
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