i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize