Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Randomize
